Please hit one

I was in the elevator… I work on a rather high floor of a building that has no elevator stops between 1 and 10. So, when you get in the elevator all the little buttons go 1, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, etc…
I’m alone on the elevator and it stops at the 10th floor. A man walks on, I’m next to the number panel. I hit the “door close” button. He looks at me incredulously and says.
“Excuse me. You just hit the door close button? You don’t bother to ask a person what floor they’re going to? That’s awfully rude,” he said in a huffy tone.
“This elevator’s going down,” I responded, confused. “I figured you were going to the first floor.”
“I know it’s going down, but don’t simply assume I want to stop at the 1st floor only.”

Again, let me reiterate… You can’t stop on any floors between 1 and 10, and the man got on at the 10th floor, and knew that the elevator was going down.
Either he was very interested in testing out how to stop on the other floors… or he’s just having a horrible day.


Fat Pigeons

Saw this sign while walking to work…

Definitely one of the best “don’t feed the birds” signs I’ve ever seen.

Why Pay Phones Aren’t Obsolete

I don’t know why… but recently I’ve been noticing pay phones a whole lot. Plus, I’ve been noticing that nobody’s really using them… but that they do serve several very important functions. Here’s just a few of the functions I’ve seen…

– When on a call on your cell phone… they make for a very nice leaning post.
– When homeless, they serve as a great place to attach the side of a grimy blanket in which to sit under to keep out of the sun.
– When trying to balance a lot of things in your hands, they make for a great table on the side of the street
– When hiding from someone, they make for a great place to hide behind, and then jump out from

Ok, this is random, but I just saw that the past couple of days, people have been using payphones on the street and in the T-Station, in almost every way possible, EXCEPT for calling. Then again, with the threat of swine flu and needles in the return slot… people have come to associate pay phones with a negative stigma. Perhaps they need a refresher PR concept.

Stop Sign Carnage

“Did you know the stop signs with the white outlines are for suggestion only?”
“What? Really?”
“Yeah!” *snicker*

Ok, that’s not true… Well… it was an actual convo between my friend and I (I being the person who asked what? really?), however… it is NOT true that the ones with the white outlines are for suggestion only. All stop signs (at least in the US) have a white outline, therefore, they all are telling you to stop.

This, however, apparently did not ring true for one person this morning.
While trying to find a parking spot, I… not having a stop sign… was literally almost hit by the same person on 3 different occasions… all at the same intersection. I live in an area with a lot of one way streets, and when it’s street cleaning day, there are ten million people at about 8am in the morning, scrambling to find alternate parking places, so that they don’t get towed…

I just found it funny that it was the same person… and by the third time, he gave ME the middle finger… I shouted out my window, “oh yes, because I’m the one that would be at fault if you hit me… go ahead! I just hope you have insurance.” To which he replied. “Massachussetts is a no fault state sweetie.” and then smirked. This callback thwarted my attempts to look tough… damn.

That makes me feel better.

The elevator going up to my office was creaking and cranking… I hate the elevators in my office building, because they almost always have something wrong with them, or make a lot of noise or jolt around… and they’re pretty fast… so it’s a bit nerve wracking.
Today, while it was clanking all the way up, I kinda made a face. I guess the other guy in the elevator saw my face, and could surmise why I looked like I was nervous.
“Don’t worry… if it falls, at least we’re high enough where death will be instant,” he said to me with a smile.

Oh, yeah… cause that makes me feel better… nothing better than a Tuesday morning instant death conversation.

In front of your face

“OMG! Ash, where are my glasses!?”
“On your face,” I replied.
“What?” She taps them, and then cracks up laughing. “You know, I kept thinking that they had just muted the lighting in here.”

I can see forgetting that you’re wearing a pair of regular glasses… but one would think that sunglasses, in front of your eyes… would be harder to “lose”

Gnarly Boogie Boarder

I got the chance to go surfing this weekend, and had a total blast.
However, the guy who made it even better was this exceptionally intense boogie boarder. He had flippers, and this hat, and a full wet suit, and he charged right out there with the surfers, and honestly… kind of put them to shame with his riding the waves ability.

I got out there at one point, bobbing about on my boogie board as I watched my friend surf… and he came over, and offered me his flippers. I didn’t take them… mostly because the guy honestly kinda creeped me out, because upon closer inspection, the man had to have been in his late 60’s, early 70’s and had the skin of an American Indian (like in the pictures… weathered, and wise).

But, I thought it was nice of him to offer me the flippers… He simply shrugged when I said no thanks, and then kicked away, and flew into the curl of a wave… Totally gnarly man.